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Thursday, December 30, 2010


Girls, when you're handling a man's schlong, cadence is very important. It's extremely frustrating when you're really close and the girl changes her rhythm, or stops to switch hands, or whatever. (In all fairness, I recognize the same is true when guys are trying to get a girl off; maybe even more so.) You almost have to start all over again. And then you can't help but think, "Well, if you had just stuck with whatever you were doing before you switched things up, we'd be done by now..."

But maybe that's my own issue because I've always had trouble moving past things. When I was younger, and the Knicks were actually good, I would always get hung up on missed foul calls (Charles Smith getting fouled multiple times under the basket! Reggie Miller blatantly shoving Greg Anthony to the fucking ground!), and for the rest of the game, or series, I'd obsess over it, like, "If they hadn't fucked up that call, we'd be still be up two, with possession, and..." blah blah blah. But at the same time, I feel like I'm compensating for the majority of people, who consistently overlook the potential impact of small errors. Minor momentum changes in games, as in life, can have major--wait. How did we get here again?

Oh yeah. If you're blowing a guy and he's close, don't fuck with the rhythm.

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