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Sunday, December 19, 2010

Slippery Slopes

At the end of the month, I'm traveling to Vietnam, Cambodia, and Thailand.  The most frequently asked questions after I inform anyone of this are prostitution-related, with a hint of ladyboy.  I think the most interesting part is that some of these people are dead serious, so let me explain why I think there's a very low probability of me putting my penis in an oft-shared vagina.

I mean, look, don't get me wrong, I totally get the appeal of prostitution; the idea of paying a hot chick to let her do whatever you want to her does seem kinda (very) fun every now and then, especially if you're busy with work and don't feel like putting in the extensive effort it takes to convince a normal hot girl to let you do stuff to her.  Because we all know, in the words of Oscar-winners Three 6 Mafia, "it's hard out here for a pimp."

But, no.  Uh uh.  If you've read my blog for any prolonged amount of time, you know the germ-factor alone is enough to dissuade me from sticking my P in any heavy-traffic V's.  But moreover, I have major moral issues with it, believe it or not.  Not in general; I actually believe prostitution should be legal, while strictly regulated, even if it isn't my cup of tea (for my more detailed explanation, read:  But prostitution in poor, third-world countries is not regulated at all.  Many women, or more accurately, girls, are forced into it.  And, those who aren't physically forced into it, but choose it , are often, as women, extremely limited in their options of viable career paths.  In a lot of these countries, a woman's body can be her sole financial commodity, and thus, while not forced into a life of prostitution, it may be the best way for her to earn enough money to be independent.  I don't really feel comfortable contributing to the perpetuation of that market by increasing demand.

You could, of course, argue that this monstrous market isn't going to miss my nominal contribution, and you'd probably be right.  Furthermore, you could even argue in favor of me contributing to that market by saying that if I give these girls more money, I may be affording them a better opportunity to escape their environments more quickly.  But to me, that's like giving money to homeless addicts when you could be donating it directly to rehab/treatment facilities instead.  Call it a philosophical difference.

Now for the caveat: the "Old Fashioned."  That is, the hand job.  This is the slippery slope, the gateway sex act, the weed of the prostitution world...  In the case of the ol' HJ, there is no penetration or risk of disease.  The prostitute is essentially giving you a massage in a region of your body where you don't usually get one.  No one would question it if she massaged the same spot on your back for about seven-and-a-half minutes in order to relieve some stress, but if she flips you over and moves about a foot south, it apparently changes things.  You could definitely rationalize it this way, saying it's just a massage . . . with a better feeling in the end, and she doesn't have to sacrifice her body.  Win-win, right?

Don't worry.  For the record, I'm still opting out.  I'm just saying . . . I understand.

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