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Monday, July 18, 2011

Awesome or Terrible?

"That's my broad, see?!"
A friend of mine recently called to tell me that he saw our mutual friend's ex-girlfriend with a new guy.  He was all excited for our friend, saying, "Her new dude is a total tool!"  Then he went silent for a few seconds and finally said, "Hmm.  Actually, I don't know if that's good or bad."

We went on to debate the topic of what type of person you'd prefer to see your ex with.  Let's start with this scenario, in which the ex is now dating a loser.  On the one hand, you're happy because she's clearly suffering with a r'tard, but does that then mean you were a jackass, too?  Whereas, if your replacement were amazing, you'd be like, fuck you for finding someone awesome and being happy, but you'd also feel kinda good because if she gets awesome guys, and you were hitting that for so long...you must be pretty awesome, too!  Sweet!

In the end, we concluded it's probably best if your replacement is significantly worse or better than you.  Much worse and you're like, serves her right!  And, if she's dating some genius Adonis, you're like, well, at least I had my chance; I can't compete with that dude... 

Actually, scratch that.  Best case scenario?  She dies alone.  Byeeeee.

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