I hate when you go out with a girl and she asks you this: "Can you carry my phone, gum, lip gloss, wallet, and keys?" No! It's not comfortable! That's why I never bring a lot of shit anywhere! That's why you have a purse. Use it. And stop acting entitled. Why should I have to endure your "super cute," bedazzled, chihuahua key chain digging into my upper thigh for the duration of our sure-to-be only date? Men aren't here to carry your shit. Do something.