I was paying for a Nutella croissant at this local bakery I periodically patronize, and I noticed they had one of those cutesy signs behind the tip jar. You know what I mean, like those magnets retarded people slap all over their refrigerators that say things like, "Give a man an inch and he thinks he's a ruler." Anyway, this is actually what the little sign said:
"As soon as the rush is over, I'm going to have a nervous breakdown. I worked for it, I owe it to myself, and NOBODY is going to deprive me of it."
Yes. That entire thing. There's absolutely nothing witty about it, in any way. It doesn't rhyme, it's not funny, it's not smart, it's not brief, there's no stupid pun involved. I don't get why someone bought that, or maybe even had it made. Who knows? I can't imagine that a company would actually mass produce that, right? And why is "NOBODY" in all CAPS?! Did someone once try to stop the proprietor from having a nervous breakdown and he vowed to never let that happen again? Or was this someone an important individual in the life of the person wanting to have the breakdown, to whom the breaker-downer would normally listen? Is that why it's in caps, as if to say, NOBODY, not even that guy, can stop me? Ridiculous.