I went to Jiffy Lube for an oil change the other day. You know how while you're waiting, they call you over to the side for that little one-on-one "consultation" after they've checked your car but before they've actually done anything yet? You know, where they tell you every imaginable filter needs to be replaced, and they'd be happy to do it for you . . . for a fee? Well, the guy calls me over, and this is what he says, "You're low on oil, sir."
Seriously?! That's what you had to tell to me? You interrupted my Highlights reading sesh' for that?! I know I'm low on oil! That's the entire principle upon which your enterprise is predicated! That's why I just handed you the keys to my car 25 minutes ago. It took you almost a half hour to tell me what I already told you when I walked in the door?!
Either they're completely retarded at Jiffy Lube (probably), or their customers are so dumb they frequently bring their cars in for an oil change when they don't actually need one (equally likely). Either way . . . ugh.